A Year To Change – eBook
Sanz Kindle Cover
Kred Badge

Face It

528111_494496560580512_1782826976_n (1)

When I am working with clients
in therapy, I often share with them
this piece of universal wisdom:

The extent to which you are willing to
cope with reality is the extent to which
you can be mentally healthy.

It’s just a phenomenon I have observed over
the past 25 years of working with people as
a psychologist and as a human being over the
past 50 years of living my own life.

Face It or Be Stuck

If you want to rid yourself of feelings of
anxiety or depression, but are not willing
to face and find a way to deal with whatever
the realities of your life are, you can forget it.

You are going to be stuck with anxiety and
depression. Get comfortable with that.

Being willing to face whatever has happened
in your life or is currently happening in your
life is often a daunting task.

And you may need help finding ways to cope
with it, deal with it, heal from it, and move on.

But in my experience, you don’t even have to
be making very good headway with dealing
with reality to have better mental health.

You just have to be willing to face reality
instead of use denial or escapism in all of
their unhealthy forms.

Reality Is A Brick Wall

Reality really is that brick wall that you can
choose to bash yourself into over and over
again because you just can’t believe it’s there
or you just don’t want to believe that it’s there.

But, it’s there.

The moment that you can admit to yourself
that it is there and begin to make some decisions
about what you want to do about that wall,
you’re set free from all the self-destructive coping
skills you had to practice in order to deny or curse
its existence.

Face It

Face it.
Face the wall.
Touch it.
Explore the bricks.
Explore the mortar.
Read the graffiti.
Paint some graffiti.

Just don’t keep walking into it over and over
again, telling me and yourself and everyone else
that it isn’t there.
That it shouldn’t be there, so it isn’t really there.
That you’ve really got this, as you plow into it
one more time, coming away bloody and bruised.
Again.

The extent to which you are willing to
cope with reality is the extent to which
you can be mentally healthy.

Leave a Reply

*

Newsletter Sign Up
Sign Up
RSS Feed

The most commonly suggested way to manage anxiety is to calm the nervous system by using diaphragmat [...]

So I was talking with a client today about boundaries. As usual. Therapists love to talk about bound [...]

Sorry for the click bait title.  The medical field has not actually discovered that cancer is contag [...]

I am lucky enough to know someone who just turned 100 years old this week. She’s my mother-in-law, G [...]

You’ve probably heard people describe life after a trauma as “the new normal.” Is there really such [...]

It’s hard to be a young person today. They are juggling the need to be relevant, successful, unique, [...]

  How do you get over an addiction to food? You’re Not Addicted to Food To be clear, you can’t have [...]

  How do you get over an addiction to food? You’re Not Addicted to Food To be clear, you can’t have [...]

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted here on SanzPlans, but I’ve been busy doing ther mental-health an [...]

It’s the admonition we all received from the time we were children: “Don’t talk to strangers!” But i [...]

  Are You In “Project Purgatory?” You want to get your garage organized but you know you will never [...]

  “So, how was your day?” Fine. “What happened in school today?” Nothing. You’re trying to connect. [...]

  You’ve probably heard of using positive affirmations to improve self-esteem. Changing the way you [...]

  Got More Stuff? So it’s getting to be that time of year when you start thinking about what to do w [...]

  Welcome! I hope you’re here because you’re ready to begin reading and working through A Year to Ch [...]

Comfort and Joy I. tiny strips of red and green paper sticky fingers and Elmer’s glue turn them into [...]

   Bah, Humbug! Hate the holidays? Dread Christmastime? For people who have nothing but bad memories [...]

  Don’t Be the Best There are a million blog posts telling you how to be better or that simply tell [...]

    The Holidays Parties. Family get-togethers. Entertaining clients. Office gift exchanges. Kids wa [...]

  National Binge Eating Day! In the U.S. this week, we will be celebrating what I only half-jokingly [...]

BlogWithIntegrity.com
Email Newsletters with Constant Contact