You know them…
The masters of that combination of sarcastic
and cynical that ends up being smugly critical
and absolutely unbearable by human beings
If the snarks are your friends
or co-workers, you can handle it
because they will eventually go away.
Or you will go away.
But what if you live with a snark?
Living With A Snark
What if every time you screw
something up, you can count on your
partner to make a snarky remark like
“Well, aren’t you the genius?”
That should actually be called a re-snark,
don’t you think?
Or if you ask your partner if they got
the mail yet, they say “No, I was waiting
for it to be delivered by drone. Of course,
I got the mail.”
A Snark In Sheep’s Clothing
Being snarky and sarcastic, although possibly
a sign of creativity and verbal intelligence,
is also a sign of something else: aggression
disguised as humor at your expense.
It is a way of communicating something
to you indirectly, and in such a way that
there is no way for you to respond without
looking even more foolish.
It is cowardly bullying, if you will.
But, there’s actually a way to deal with snarks
that is both effective and kind of fun,
so let’s go snark hunting!
The best way to handle a snark is to “play
dumb.” Of course, the snark will say “that’s
not going to be that hard for you, now is it?”
(Don’t you just hate snarks?)
Another way to say that you’re going to play
dumb is that you are going to force the snark
to own up to what they are doing and communicate
directly, instead of using indirect, sarcastic,
You’re going to force the snark to shed his
sarcastic wool and come out of hiding!
Snark: “Well, aren’t you the genius?!”
You: “Are you saying that I am a genuis?”
Snark: “Ummm…I thought it was obvious
I wasn’t calling you a genius.”
You: “Why would you call me a genius if
you don’t think I am a genius?”
Force the snark to say it: “I was calling you
a genius to be mean. Because I didn’t think
you were being very smart.”
You: “Why would you do that?”
The Power of “Why?”
The most powerful question you can ask
of a snark is “Why?”
Mainly because the snark doesn’t ever think
to ask why they are snarky.
Or if it’s okay to be snarky to you.
But it’s high time he started.
Now that you know how to handle snarks,
you can have some fun with the mean,
sarcastic, attempts to belittle remarks
that come your way.
Refuse to read between the lines and
remember to ask the all-important
“Why?” question and you’ll make the
ocean a lot safer to swim in.
Or your apartment or home to live in.
Or your workplace to work in.
Come on in. The conversation’s fine!